You’re not alone. Eating when we are tired is one of the biggest derailers of diets and weight loss efforts. You can stay as strong as you want all morning, but by the afternoon…well, it’s a different story. Read my article on Suite101.com for some solutions that might very well help you over the hump—and keep those pounds falling off.

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Weight loss can be easy, but it’s also easy to make mistakes that will wreck your plans for a healthier body. See if you are making these common mistakes, fix them, and watch your efforts to lose weight reignite. “Bullet proof” yourself with these tips from my column “The Fit Life.”

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(Written for LA’s the Place.)

The 5 Weight Loss Mistakes Your Are Making Right Now

They might not be deadly sins, but there are five mistakes easily made when trying to lose weight. Some of these might seem like common sense, but you might also be surprised how many of these weight loss follies you are currently making.  Ready to see where you stand?

5. Skimping on Meals

Contrary to what we commonly believe, “starving ourselves thin” can actually stall your weight loss efforts.

When you eat too few calories your body thinks it’s starving and goes into “fat conservation mode” instead of “fat burning mode”. The smart machine that it is, your body knows something is up when you drastically cut calories and begins to slow your metabolism. The less you eat, the less you burn and the less weight you lose.

The solution: Eat a minimal number of calories to keep your metabolism going. Unless medically supervised, the generally recognized safe lower limits are 1,200 calories per day for women and 1800 calories per day for men. Don’t fear gaining weight if your metabolism has slowed down. A few weeks of “proper” amounts of food will get your body back on track.

4. Skipping Meals

Do you eat two or three meals a day and wonder why you’re not losing weight? You’re not alone. Another common weight loss mistake is not eating often enough.  Not eating regularly can not only slow down your metabolism, but also leave you feeling so starved you’re more likely to reach for those donuts or the bag of chips.

The solution: Eating five or so times per day (three smaller meals and two to three healthy snacks) keeps your metabolism running smoothly. It also stabilizes your blood sugars, which helps you stay alert, gives you more energy and puts you in a better mood.

3. Not Skipping at All

Many people ignore a main key to weight loss: Exercise. Any time you diet you inevitably lose some muscle. Muscle uses more calories per pound than fat does as you go about even your basic daily activities, You go on a diet, you lose weight, you lose muscle, you burn fewer calories, you gain weight.

The solution: Find a way—any way—to fit exercise into your day. 10 minutes here and 10 minutes there are better than nothing, and it all adds up. The most important way to keep your metabolism up? Strength training. Whether you lift weights, work with kettlebells, exercise tubing, strenuous yoga, or machines, firming up those muscles will not only help you lose weight, but will also keep the weight off.

2. Scratching Favorite Foods Off Your List

For the very short term it’s entirely possible to cut out your favorite foods or drink, but in the long run eliminating everything you like from your diet will lead to certain weight loss failure. Never indulging will leave you feeling deprived, causing you to binge or go off your diet.

The Solution: Moderation. Eat a healthy diet 85% of the time, and allow 15% for “less than perfect” foods. (I don’t use the word “bad” to describe foods as no foods are truly bad… it’s all in how you use them.) Try to put some balance into your life and let yourself live every now and then—just don’t overdo it. If the weight is not coming off, then be a bit stricter and schedule in less frequent indulgence. Eat to live—don’t live to eat—but also take a moment to enjoy.

1. Not sleeping enough.

Not getting those pesky zzzzs can really affect your waistline. Watch your food and exercise all you want, but if you regularly don’t sleep enough you are asking for weight loss trouble. The hormone that makes you feel full takes a dive when  you are sleep-deprived, while the hormone that tells you to eat ramps up. What does that spell? Hunger… and difficulty adhering to your plan to lose weight.

The solution: Try going to bed earlier. The sleep you get before midnight is more important than the sleep after, so try to get to bed a bit earlier. See if you can clock an extra 30 minutes every night for a week and then bump it up to an hour. If you’re not sleeping enough, that extra hour can really make a difference in your weight loss.

There you have it—five common mistakes with five simple solutions. Try to incorporate these into you daily life, step-by-step, and watch those pounds melt away.

I, too, feel the bloat, so here are some of my previous blog posts on weight loss resolutions and staying with it. Time to read my own work, he he. Enjoy…and have a great, brand-spankin’ new year!

Sticking to Weight Loss Resolutions

Keeping Weight Loss Resolutions – The Beginning

Keeping Weight Loss Resolutions – Sticking With It

New Year’s Weight Loss Resolutions

“So maybe tomorrow. I’ll find my way home…” ~Stereophonics

Four years ago I was a superfit 119 pounds (down from my original 200 pounds). At one point during the summer of 2005, I was down to 114 pounds – too thin by my standards (I am only 5 feet tall). Today – well, today I have no idea how much I weigh. I am going to guess about 128, judging from the fact that I can’t button most of my pants, or when I do, I have a terrible muffin top. (As an aside – I no longer weigh myself because I refuse to focus on a number.)

I way fell off the superfit weight loss wagon about three years ago when the stress of being a single mom with limited income drove me to eat too much chocolate and too many Ritz Crackers.

I still exercised and taught Spinning classes, but the calories I was snacking on were overtaking the calories I was expending.

Then – earlier this year – I buckled down, cut out most of the “white” carbs, started eating healthier overall and lost 11 of the approximately 20 pounds I had gained. Everyone noticed, and people everywhere commented. I felt good and happy about myself…good enough to get rid of the pants that had some “growing room” around the waist.

I don’t know what happened between then and now, but when I went to put on my jeans two weeks ago I couldn’t button them. Not only could I not button my jeans, but I couldn’t button any pants at all! And since I’d given away my “heavier” jeans during my last move, I had nothing left to wear but sweatpants (I refuse to go out and buy larger pants). I was very frustrated, disgusted, mad and sad. I wanted to just give up and eat everything in sight…and feel sorry for myself. Then, a week ago, I decided to once again take the bull by the horns. I lost 82 pounds before – I can lose about 10…I think.

The biggest change I noticed that had caused the weight gain is that I had gone back to my old “fat” thinking of “I’ll start tomorrow.” This is the exact thinking that got me to 200 pounds in the first place. Over the last few years, with stresses mounting, lots of late nights working, issues with kids in school – I fell right back into the old trap of “feel good now, start fresh tomorrow.”

The funny thing is – my motto for fitness has been “tomorrow never comes.” And do you know what? It doesn’t. That is how I gained those 20 pounds back – waiting for a tomorrow where everything will be easier.

So in the course of one short week my pants fit a bit better and I feel more confident. Why? Because, once more, I cut out (or way back on) the “white” carbs (which are really just sugary foods, crackers, white breads, pastas), added more protein and really paid attention to my diet. But the biggest secret was nipping myself in the bud when I was tired and not allowing myself to overeat for energy and then “start tomorrow.” Last week, I started “today.” And kept going.

Even tonight when I went out for Mexican food, I did have lots of chips, salsa, and even sour cream. I had eaten pretty healthily most of this week and ate a light breakfast this morning in anticipation of this “linner.” The “slipping back” me would have taken this a step further and continued to eat junkie foods tonight because I’d “already blown it.” The me that lost the original 82 pounds took control, though, and said, “You’re done. You didn’t blow it. You planned this, you had fun, and now you go back to eating lightly.”

So yes – my pants fit a bit better. And by Christmas I hope to report that the muffin top is no longer “muffining.”

Onward.

~Helen

Photo: ©Flickr: nhanusek

“Waiting for the end to come. Wishing I had strength to stand. This is not what I had planned. It’s out of my control.” ~Linkin Park

When I was a young girl my mother was always dieting. I grew up watching her go through the latest fads in diets: The low carb (or, eat all the bacon and eggs you want) diet, the grapefruit diet, the pineapple diet, the “diet pill” (amphetamine) non-diet and everything in between. My mother was not very overweight at all. In fact, she was what I would call “normal” for her time. But no matter how “normal” in weight they are, women diet. That is what we do. Weight loss trumps all.

Being surrounded by dieting for so long (and being a serial dieter myself with my own body image issues), I learned all about what to eat – and what not to eat – to lose weight. To put it simply, in the world of dieting all the foods that taste fabulous are bad you, and all the foods that do not tickle your taste buds are good for you. Don’t eat bread, don’t eat fat, don’t eat sugar, don’t eat fruit, don’t snack, don’t eat solid foods..we are surrounded by “dont’s.” So, why, then are we still fat?

Because there are no “do”s.

For the most part, all diets work. They really do. Some are more healthy than others, but in reality, if you follow a diet to a T it will work. The problem with diets is that they are not realistic in the long run. Atkins advocates the low carb route, which has some merit in and of itself…unless you like regular bowel movements or you exercise a lot. The 4-hour-body diet has some very sound principles as well…if you can live with “slow carbs,” an expensive bevy of supplements and ridiculous tricks to “hack” your body’s metabolism (ice bath, anyone?).

The best diets out there are the ones based on real people’s lives and they share two very important commonalities: Balance and moderation. The Zone and Weight Watchers, for example, are both based on good basic everyday nutritional principles (with the possible exception of letting your carb habit get out of control – many Weight Watchers snacks are loaded with sugars though lower in calories and fat). More than anything, though, these diets work because they let you live while you diet.

We can all stay on extreme diets for the short-term, and sometimes we should try different eating styles to shock our bodies. But can you really live without ever again having a slice of pizza, a glass of wine, or a piece of fudge?

If you have to give up every pleasure food gives you just to live in a marginally smaller body, is it worth it? Or should you eat very healthily 80% of the time and give yourself a margin of error of 20%?

It’s time we take the power away from food. There are no “bad” foods. Only “bad” long-term choices. Eat a little bit stricter for awhile until you reach a body weight that’s healthy for you, but don’t tell yourself, “No way, not ever will I eat that again.” That’s setting yourself up for failure. We’ve had enough of that. When you see some weight loss progress, gradually add back in some of the things that you love (within moderation of course, ma chérie.)

Life is about living. So go live. Laugh. Enjoy.

Onward and forward.

~Helen

Photo ©Space Commander

This is a moving guest post by Deborah Nicosia. It will resonate with all of us who have struggled with our weight. Look for more from Debbie in the future if I can convince her.

So, yesterday I had a typical “diet fail.” My intentions were good as I started the day…they usually are. I got my coffee and had four scrambled egg whites with one yolk.

Off to a crazy Saturday at work. I work five hours with a 15 minute break, so there is no time to walk upstairs, stand in line and get lunch. There was nothing at home to bring for lunch, because I forgot to plan for myself. I had been taking care of sick kids all week…..and forgot about me, as usual.

No time to venture upstairs at work and only a dollar in my pocket. This meant getting two hot dogs quickly, and go back to work. Cheap, quick, and I’ll be full!

When I got home I was totally exhausted. My feet were throbbing, and I was starving. It had been four hours since I ate the two hot dogs. My husband arrived home 30 minutes later with three egg rolls in hand. I devoured all three of them. I was satisfied after two, but…they tasted so good I didn’t stop until they were gone.

I had promised the kids to take them to a movie later. The popcorn smelled so wonderful. I wasn’t even hungry, but was overcome by the smells and decided to “splurge.” I ordered a small popcorn, but then the girl behind the counter asked ” Do you want a medium for just a dollar more?” So, now I had a medium popcorn that I kept eating long after I was full. Then I helped myself to some of my daughter’s Skittles and M&M’s that she had brought with from home.

If I had made a lunch to take with to work, and eaten a healthy satisfying dinner when I came home, I probably would not have eaten all the fattening unhealthy foods yesterday. But it is a vicious cycle. With stress, exhaustion, and the feeling of being overwhelmed from having to remember everyone’s needs, except my own, I realized that I lost my core many years ago. I have not been important to “me,” and I put myself last – always.

I have now been overweight for nine yrs. My daughter has never known me “average weight.” But, I know that with the “Real World Weight Loss’” stories, and support, I can can change my life. Put me first. And I am not alone.

I used to be an avid weight lifter and hated anything cardiovascular. I would run, sure, but despised every minute of it. Sometimes I would ride my bike to school but only out of necessity because I didn’t want to take the bus. For the thrill of it, the power of it, the invincibility of it, I would always lift weights. Nothing beat the feel of cold, hard, heavy steel in my hands.

Now that I’ve gotten older I have switched teams and am a die-hard cardio fiend (in the form of Spinning® and cycling). How and when this traitorous change happened I am not sure. All I know is that I’ve played on both sides equally and aerobic exercise is now my drug, I mean exercise, of choice.

This is the question debated hotly back and forth in the fitness world: “Which type of exercise – cardio or strength training – is best for weight loss?” Trainers and group exercise instructors fight over this at length. Both camps claim that “mine is better than yours,” with trainers leading the weight lifting charge and class instructors flying the cardio flag.

All the while, Pilates and yoga gurus probably stand quietly and Zenly by, with their tight cores and neutral spines,  laughing at our inability to come to an agreement.

In many cases, the weights vs. cardio camps are so intensely divided that it is almost like our political system. No matter what common sense (or the U.S. population) says, Republicans and Democrats agree only to vehemently disagree, not seeing any shared ground. Exercising for weight loss, like politics, is full of gray areas and again like politics the best answer is the common sense one: a little bit from both sides.

There are many variables and subcultures even in the respective camps (high intensity training, super slow training, aerobic zone training, interval training) and I am not going to get into those now. Like everything relating to losing weight, becoming healthier and living a full life, the letter B is our friend. B is for balance. No one wants a one-sided relationship, and that includes your body.

To lose weight, and maintain what you’ve lost, you need both aerobic exercise and weight training. It’s that simple. Weight training gives you a longer calorie burn after exercising, while aerobic activity burns off large amounts of calories instantly. They really are the yin and yang to each other.

If you were to ask strength training and aerobic exercise to sell you on their benefits, their answers would be this:

Captain of Team W -Weight training:

I…

• Give you a longer “after burn”post- exercise
• Increase your muscles’ size and strength (or “tone you up” as some, ahem, like to say)
• Help you burn more calories throughout the day since muscles need more calories to just survive
• Increase your bone density
• Help you look thinner as muscles, while heavier, take up less room than fat

Captain of Team A – Aerobic exercise:

I…

• Burn a lot of calories right off the bat
• Help you become leaner overall
• Increase your lung and heart size and function
• Release endorphins (the pain-killing chemicals)
• Put you in a better mood
• Circulate fresh oxygen throughout your body (and help you feel more alert)

As you can see from this very partial debate list, both types of exercise are essential. The trick is finding something that works for you and that covers both bases. Often, we are either “weight lifters” or “cardio freaks,” and our health truly is the sum of both. This is where we have to learn to play nice with the “other side” and not be so partisan.

Find an activity you love to do that challenges you…and mix in what you need but don’t necessarily love. My choices: Spinning classes and outdoor cycling for aerobic exercise (and mental health adjustment); body weight exercises with the TRX system for strength; kettlebells for a mix of both. This combination has kept me fit and happy and rarely do a I pick up an actual weight anymore. I choose my “poisons” wisely and am happier for it.

The right exercise to help you lose weight? Marry Camp A with Camp W, and produce cute little super fit Camp AW bodies.

What about you? Which category do you fall into? And what is your “acceptable” cross-training method?

Onward and forward.

~Helen

P.S. Not sure how much exercise you really need? Read my exercise post on that subject.

“We were told just to sit tight, ’cause somebody will soon arrive. Help is on the way. But it never came.” ~ Help is On the Way*/Rise Against

Talking in the car today on our morning ride to school, the kids and I discuss middle school drama. We talk about material things, cliques and “mean girls.” Then I bring up life’s real woes, like the people in Haiti who still live in tents after the earthquake a year ago, with little fresh water available. Or the Haitian children playing shoeless in the streets with random objects for toys. And how kids in Africa are still starving while watching their parents die of AIDS. We talk…and we think about life.

It’s a sad world out there. And yet…in many industrialized nations we are still struggling with one huge issue: obesity. In the grand scheme of things, obesity doesn’t seem like it should be a huge (pun intended) problem. But it is. It is, indeed.

I started thinking about how this all happened. How did we become so obsessed with weight and weight loss? Why, with all the tools and medical advice available to us, do we as a nation still get fatter and fatter while in other parts of the world people starve to death?

I think, possibly, that we may be starving inside. We drive nice cars, live in big houses, work all day, watch TV all night, and yet we are unhappy and starving mentally - hence why we overeat. Maybe we are so disconnected from the rest of the world that our own problems feel insurmountable. Maybe we have built prisons for ourselves by stuffing our feelings and pretending all is well in our worlds. I know I did.

In places where people have lost everything and still go on with their lives (think of what happened on our own shores, for example, in New Orleans), the difference might be a sense of connection to people and community. When people don’t have a lot of options in their lives, they stay connected with each other, help each other, lean on each other and share. In our normal, everyday lives we are so disconnected from that feeling of community that maybe our only option to feel something is to indulge in the momentary pleasure food brings us. Maybe we are feeding our souls with the wrong things. Maybe we are cramming our bodies with food when what our minds and hearts really want a community and a sense of belonging.

Maybe we should slow down and spend some time with friends. Help a brother out. Volunteer. Give back. Re-connect. Reach out for help instead of going it alone. Feed our hearts with love and friendships, instead of our mouths with unimportant stuff.

Maybe then we will finally stop looking for happiness in a bag of Hershey Kisses.

Maybe. Just maybe.

Onward and forward.

~Helen

*Help is On the Way was written by punk rockers Rise Against about the disasters that have affected the New Orleans area. They knit their thoughts about Hurricane Katrina and the BP oil spill into this song from their new album “Endgame.” The socially forward group has seen amazing commercial success while staying true to their core beliefs: making others aware of society’s issues and problems..and trying to effect change. Rock on. (Read my Rise Against review.)