(read part one – The Beginning)

In order to keep with your resolution to lose weight you need to take baby steps. Break down you goal into manageable chunks. Don’t try for that bikini body just yet…there is plenty of time. Striving for such a large goal will almost ensure that you fail. It seems so far away – so difficult – so unattainable – so why bother?

FAKE IT

The reality is that it probably took you years to gain the weight and it is not going to come off without a fight. You have to fake yourself out. Having one large goal looming ahead of you is often not enough to keep you motivated. How can you focus on the body you want when those chocolate chip cookies are fresh, warm and oh-so-yummy?

The second step to our plan (the last one was walking) is to fake yourself out. Forget the larger goal. Your immediate goal is to walk 3-5 times per week and say “half” to junkie foods. That’s it. By giving in to a craving only partially, you don’t sabotage yourself and you don’t feel deprived.

Doing it this way fakes you out because you can have want you want – just half of it. And you can’t possibly blow it. If you want that cookie – and I mean really want that cookie – give yourself a half of one and then go brush your teeth – immediately. Tell yourself you can eat the other half tomorrow. This is the simplest and easiest way to control your cravings. Give in…to a point.

“I’ve already blown it with that bite of chocolate,” I would think to myself. “I might as well continue eating whatever I want today and start fresh tomorrow.” Have you ever felt that way? And did you really “start fresh tomorrow” or did you simply take a bite of something “forbidden” the next day and once again repeat that mantra? The “all or nothing mentality” only serves to allow you to binge out of control and continue gaining weight.

That is exactly how I lived for many years while my weight just continued to balloon.

Question: How do you feel about eating just half of something? Do you think you can do it?

It’s that most wonderful time of the year again..the time for resolutions. The time for change. Did you make resolutions again this year? If so, do you think you will be able to keep them?

If you don’t, you are in good company. Resolutions are very hard to keep. In fact, over 70% of people fail stick to their resolutions, according to a recent study.

SUCCESS…OR NOT

Instead of focusing on the negatives – like how many people cannot keep their resolutions – let’s focus on the positive. How many people are successful? And of those that are, how do they do it?

People who are able to commit to a resolution are no different from you or I. What makes them able to do what we often can’t is that they plan. They break their “project” down into smaller steps and develop a course of action to achieve those steps. They don’t just look at the final end result with no idea of how to get there…that, my friends, is a recipe for failure.

Breaking things down into smaller, more manageable steps is how I was finally able to lose 80 pounds myself. I had tried – year after year – to “start on New Year’s” or “start on Monday.” Unfortunately, with no clear plan other than to burn more calories than I took it, I always failed. And I hated myself for it.

23 YEARS OF FAILURE

So how did I finally manage to lose weight? I actually started with just one step: Walking my kids to school. My goal at that point was not to lose weight – it was simply to become healthier. I had given up on weight loss, because in my own eyes I was a complete failure at it. I had a 23 year track record of that failure, all documented by notations and “new beginnings” on a wall calendar. I even had wishful weekly “goal weights” written on that calendar – and every week they were scratched off and begun again.

Until I changed my approach.

My new method? For about three weeks the only change I made in my life was walking my children to school three days a week – two miles round trip. That was all. And it was the beginning.

To be continued…

>START NOW. Implement a simple walking program with the goal of just…walking. Don’t focus on weight loss. Just walk, 3-5 days a week. Exercise is good for so much more than weight loss. Just do it..and post a comment to tell me about your progress.

You might feel like a deer in headlights when you look down: Frozen, in shock, unable to believe what you are seeing or avert your gaze. What is happening? The numbers on the scale are creeping up…up…up  And it’s not even Christmas yet.

Many a client and friend complained to me this week that their pants are already tight, with only one Holiday down and the major one still to go. None of us truly dare get on the scale lest we are forced to face the truth: What we did to ourselves. (Overate.) And the reason why. (Because it felt good and we were powerless to stop.)

I ate pretty decently and semi-healthy on Thanksgiving (veggie burger, portabella mushrooms and fresh veggies) with the exception of the three large, super delicious, fattening yet yummy buttered biscuits and a child-size hot fudge Sundae. Friday I was back on the Spin bike, co-teaching a 2-hour Spinning® class, all proud of myself.

Saturday I fell apart and ate everything that was not nailed down.

Sunday I started out with a healthy  morning that graduated into leftover pizza, brownies, ice cream and chips.

So what did I do then? Got back on track the very next day, feeling better and less bloated in only two days. It’s not too late for you, either.

How to get back on track?

1. Resume exercising. Immediately. Exercise makes you feel healthier, which in turn can help you eat healthier. So what if your gym clothes are tight and you feel like a heffer? Get back in there – today. Show yourself that you have what it takes to wrest the control back.

2. Drink lots of water. Too many sweet and salty foods, combined with alcohol, can make you dehydrated. When you are dehydrated, you can feel hungry and tired. And when you are hungry and tired, you start eating. It’s a vicious cycle that needs to be broken, and a simple glass of water (or unsweetened sparking water) can help.

3. Fill up on fresh fruit. To ease that post-Holiday gnawing in your stomach, eat some fruit. Fruit contains vitamins, minerals, water, fiber and even natural sugars (mmm). It’s healthy, not man-made, and pretty tasty, too. It might not be as good as a cookie, but you can pronounce all of the ingredients.

4. Don’t beat yourself up. Look at your whole week, not just one or two days. If you can manage to eat healthily and squeeze in some exercise before and after the eating spree then all is not lost. Don’t knock yourself or your willpower. Your inner voice will hear you. Tell yourself you rock, you had fun, and now it’s time to take care of your health again.

5. Eat lightly before and after, and allow yourself some cheating room. If you eat leanly for six days before the Holidays and splurge that one day, it really won’t make much of a difference. You have to enjoy life, too. Just don’t let your one day become several days or an entire week.  That’s where the real damage happens.

We all have three simple choices every week:

1. Gain weight
2. Lose weight
3. Maintain weight.

Aim for number 2 before each Holiday and number 3 around the Holidays. Remember that every day we have new choices to make, and every day is a new chance to change your life – for better or worse. Your call.

Q: Are you back on track? How did you do over the Holidays? What tips do you want to share (no need to register to comment.)

You wake up feeling sick: Head hurting, stomach squirrely, very tired, and thirsty. You know you shouldn’t have done it but you did anyway. You pop some pain killers, drink a gallon of water, eat some carrots and swear you won’t ever do it again. But you will – in less than a month. And once more you will feel awful. What did you do? Overindulge with food – and suffering the proverbial “binge hangover.”

Holiday Hell

The Holiday season is starting again, and with it comes the constant parties, gatherings, and family get-togethers. Everywhere we look there is food, food, and more food. Most people have a hard time resisting the temptation, but for those of us with food issues the Holidays are the equivalent of hell.

No one would bring an alcoholic to a bar and tell him that just one drink won’t hurt. No one would leave a prescription drug addict alone in a pharmacy and encourage them to use whatever drugs they want “just for today.” Yet – how many people encourage you to eat at Holiday gatherings, telling you that “one day won’t hurt,” “you can start tomorrow,” or “don’t be so rigid?”

One day will hurt.

And tomorrow you may feel so bad about yourself and your lack of control that you won’t regain it, pushing your “fresh start” further out of reach.  That is the scary truth.

Losing the Battle with Food

As someone who lost 82 pounds five years ago (and regained 22 of them over the last two years), I can testify to the negative powers of Holiday pressure. Just three short years ago I could eat here and there throughout the Holidays and not overindulge. Food was just food and a cookie was just a cookie. Then the stress of life started to get to me and I gave in, reverting back to some of my old habits, where one yummy cookie became an entire tray of stress-relieving happiness. I had once again lost the battle with food, and given up my ability to say “no.”

But I’ve already blown it…

Learning to control Holiday eating is a common problem. Aidalyn Soliman Myers of Murrieta lost 60 pounds in the last two years and expresses a sentiment shared by many. “My biggest thing is eating something early in the day and thinking to myself, ‘Well, I already ruined it, so I’m going to go all out today and pig out!’” Myers, who recently became a certified Spinning® instructor and teaches other group fitness classes, had to alter her mindset to keep her weight at bay. “Now, I changed my way of thinking and try to eat healthful after that and tell myself that every bit counts, so eating healthy even after falling off the wagon will definitely count!”

Alana Estrada Clarke, a Murrieta personal trainer, Spinning and Pilates instructor with legs that turn even women’s heads, uses her brain instead of her feelings to get through Holiday meals. “I don’t skip breakfast or lunch on the ‘big day’ with anticipation of a large meal,” she says. “When you do that, you end up consuming more calories by being starved, and your metabolism will slow down in response to the lack of food.” (Read Clarke’s other Holiday eating tips.)

It’s you – and only you – for the Holidays

As a trainer, Spinning instructor and motivational coach I should know better. But, like many people, I am human, sometimes weak – and easily led to the “dark side” of eating. The moment of joy, of relief, of sensory pleasure as the brownie hits my lips is indescribably wonderful and almost worth the price. But only almost. With my pants tight and “muffin top” once again part of my life, this Holiday season I am taking control back. Starting today. And tomorrow, which happens to be Thanksgiving.

What are you going to do this Holiday season? Let food control you or will you control your food? The choice is always up to you.

We have all made them.

“I’m busy.”

“I don’t have the right foods.”

“I don’t have time for my full work out so I might as well not work out at all today.”

“I have to go to a party so I will indulge now and start my diet tomorrow.”

“I had a bad day.”

Or my favorite (one which I use frequently) “I’m too tired” (to lift weights, ride my bike, eat an apple, go for a walk, play with my kids.)

We are too (busy / tired / depressed) to take care of our health and our weight, and yet we make time for everything, and everyone else. (Americans watch nearly five hours of television every – single – day.)

Watch THIS VIDEO from Nike. It may help you put those excuses to rest. Take out a notebook and write your own excuses down. Borrow some from the video if you’d like. Read over your list, then look back at something you really wanted (a new car, that fabulous jacket, the European vacation, the widescreen TV). Would you let the same list of excuses stand in your way? Would you allow those same reasons keep you from getting what you wanted? Or would you make every effort possible to overcome ANY obstacle?

Think about it.

I’ve used most of these myself – have you?

I just read a forum post with that title. The poster talks about being fat, how disgusted she is with her weight, and gives people her diet plan for “tomorrow.”

Will she make it? Probably not. Because planning to lose weight tomorrow doesn’t ensure success – it ensures failure. Waiting for tomorrow is how I gained almost 90 pounds. Because every day I waited for tomorrow gave me a whole extra day to eat whatever I wanted…license to eat everything that was not nailed down. Eat, eat, eat, gorge, gorge, gorge. Because tomorrow – that magical tomorrow – I would start my diet. Finally be thin. The following day, when I “blew it” and hated myself bitterly, I would plan to start the next tomorrow. And so on. Day after day. Year after year. Pound after pound. Tomorrow after tomorrow.

How did I finally change? How did I finally succeed? By starting today. This minute. This meal. NOW. Not tomorrow. It was difficult. I would rather have waited for yet another tomorrow, one full of empty promises to myself. But the tomorrows had never materialized, so I forced my tomorrow to start today. Finally took control of my own life – and succeeded.

When will your tomorrow start?

It is common knowledge that a healthy diet for weight loss consists of lots of fruits and vegetables, plenty of water, unprocessed foods and loads of fiber. But if I told you that pizza is part of the equation, would you believe it? If I told you pizza is a health food would you buy it?

Refined carbs (including pizza), soda, alcohol and candy are all persona non grata in the health arena. Caffeine, sugar and fat are on our “bad” lists, as is eating late at night. And yet, just two weeks ago I found myself driving home at 1 a.m., eating five-hour cold greasy pizza out of a box in the backseat of my car, and stopping at a fast food joint for fully caffeinated coffee in the middle of the night. How does a personal trainer justify that? Easily. And would she recommend it to her clients? Definitely. With the following disclaimer, of course.

Every day we make choices, some easier than others. What we wear, what we do with our day, who we talk to, and if we exercise, improve ourselves and eat healthily.

A few of us live under strict standards, rarely indulging in anything known to thicken our waists or tickle our taste buds. The flip side are those of us who eat whatever we choose whenever we choose, justifying our decision to scarf an entire bag of chips and a box of chocolate because we are stressed, tired or frustrated. We lay on the sofa watching TV because we are too fatigued to move, becoming even more so in the process. Neither of those scenarios are ideal.

The first group is often in pursuit of perfection, chiseling and sculpting their bodies into amazing pieces of art. They are simply beautiful to look at and we envy their dedication and restraint. Working in the fitness field as I do, and knowing many of these perfect creatures, I have come to the following conclusion: They may be gorgeous but they are no happier than us mere mortals.

Having been part of the latter group who eats to fill a void or because we “deserve” a treat (or ten), never making a change and always waiting for tomorrow to start taking care of our health, I can also state that they are no happier than the rest of us, either.

So where does the pizza fit in? Under B for Balance.

Balance is the melding of two worlds: the perfect world and the real world. Balance is the ability to indulge every now and then without going crazy. Balance is the ability to enjoy life while being healthy overall. Balance is the ability to stop obsessing about everything you put in your mouth, making good choices most of the time and less good choices other times. Balance is where the 80/20 rule comes into play. 80% clean eating, 20% fun eating. Will you be a size 2 with the 80/20 rule? Probably not (though you may be a 4 or a 6). Will you be healthy? Most likely. Will you be happy? Almost certainly.

The cold pizza at 1 a.m.? It was a bonding experience with my son. We bought it on our way to cover the Blue October Concert in Los Angeles, ate some in the car on the way from Temecula, finished off the rest on the return trip. It was unhealthy, greasy, and oh-so-much-fun, as was our evening together. I didn’t compound the damage by continuing to eat junk the rest of the night. I didn’t feel I had “blown it” and used that as a license to further feed my face. I used it as an opportunity to share a moment with my near-teenage son, who won’t want to hang with his mom pretty soon, no matter how cool I think I am.

Pizza as a health food? Yes. A mental health food. My son and I ate, laughed, watched the concert, hurried through the empty streets of LA, ate more then-cold pizza in the car, pulled over for coffee halfway home, and fell into bed at 2 a.m., exhausted but happy. The evening became a memory – a memory of doing something together, sharing a moment, experiencing life – over pizza.

Balance = bonding
Bonding = happiness
Happiness = good life
Good life = balance

What is your take?

The electronic version of my “Living the Fit Life” is here. >Download your copy now. It’s free! (Courtesy of LA’s the Place.com.)

Post any comments you might have about it. I’d love to hear your feedback.

January 1 sported plenty of people out jogging…apparently folks who usually do not jog. They struggled. They ran barely above crawling. They limped. And yet onward they jogged, full of agony. Why? Because their new year’s resolutions told them to.

How long will these joggers keep running? Not long enough. Of the 70% of people who make new year’s resolutions every year a large majority will not keep them. They set unrealistic goals, do not have a proper plan in place, and believe that on an arbitrary date things will “be different.”

THE FRESH START APPROACH

The “fresh start,” or clean slate, concept is what motivates many people to make new year’s resolutions. It also gives them license to “be bad” up until that date, knowing that on the magical day of January 1 they will be transformed into strong-willed exercise machines. Unfortunately, as someone who has seen many a January 1 (or many a Monday) come and go with no miraculous change within myself, I can attest to the fact that there is one big problem with the fresh start approach: The date may be fresh, but you are still…you. With the same life, same issues, same problems you had on December 31. Until you resolve those problems and change your thought patterns, your resolutions will start, stop, and stay unfulfilled.

WHAT TO DO?

1) Forget the resolution. Begin now (whenever that is). Start this day, this meal. Don’t wait for tomorrow. Don’t wait for Monday. Every day you don’t start is another day wasted – and another excuse.

2) From this moment on, think of your health – not your waistline. Is that cookie good for your waist? Probably not. But more importantly, does it do anything good for your body? Your overall health? Your blood sugar levels? If it’s doesn’t serve a purpose nutritionally, eat less of it. Notice the phrase “eat less of it” rather than “don’t eat it?” Telling yourself you will never eat chocolate (or drink wine) again is not realistic. And you will not be able to stick with it. You will “fail” yourself, and wind up waiting for yet another Monday, or another January 1.

3) Set realistic goals. Think baby steps. Don’t look at your total weight loss goal. If you have 50 pounds to lose, think about your immediate short term goal and what it will take to get you there. Buy pants the next size down and make it your immediate goal to fit into them. Or work on making it through an entire exercise class without falling over. Try for a target of eight push ups instead of two. When you reach that specific goal, set another (realistic) one. And another. Pretty soon you will be much farther along than you could imagine.

4) Create a plan. If you want to fit into that next size smaller, plan to add a lot of fruits and vegetables to your diet. Plan to drink a lot of water. Plan to start walking. Those few steps alone will help you lose that one size. Then, for your next step, plan to cut down on sugar. Plan to add in weight training. Bingo. Another size bites the dust.

THE HABIT

It takes around three weeks to create a new habit. Start a new healthy one at three week intervals. For every interval you finish, you are that much closer to your goal. And that much healthier.

I HATE ME!

Above all, don’t beat yourself up if you slip. Simply try to go longer and longer between slip-ups. If you eat a pan of brownies, well so be it. You haven’t “blown it.” Don’t take that slip up as permission to continue eating. Just get back on track immediately: The very…next…meal.

The best resolution of all: Recognize that you are human. But try to be the best human you can be…for yourself and your health.

>download hard copy of article (nyresolutionsh.pdf)

(written for lastheplace.com)

The holidays. They are here, once again. Endless days of parties, pastries, shopping and stress. Everywhere you look and everywhere you go temptation abounds. Clients bring edible gifts, friends deliver baked goods. The office holiday party overflows with food and drink.

With enticement everywhere, what do you do? Give in and pay the price in January? Or sacrifice now and start the new year without a brand-new muffin top? To make it easier on you, here’s a guide to enjoying yourself sensibly.

(continue reading at LA’s the Place)